From Your Dog – Things That Tick Me Off!!
Tuesday, May 20th, 2008 at 7:07 am
- Blaming your farts on me…not funny.
- Yelling at me for barking… I’M A FRIGGIN’ DOG YOU IDIOT!!
- How you naively believe that the stupid cat isn’t all over everything while you’re gone. (Have you noticed that your toothbrush tastes a little like cat?)
- Taking me for a walk, then not letting me check stuff out. (Exactly whose walk is this anyway?)
- Any trick that involves balancing food on my nose…stop it.
- Yelling at me for rubbing my butt on your carpet. Why’d you buy carpet?
- Getting upset when I sniff the crotches of your guests. Sorry but I haven’t quite mastered that handshake thing yet.
- How you act disgusted when I lick myself. Look, we both know the truth, your just jealous.
- Dog sweaters. Have you noticed my fur?
- Any haircut that involves bows or ribbons. Now you know why we chew your stuff up when you’re not home.
- When you insist on picking up the piles in the yard. Do you realize how far behind schedule that puts me?
- Taking me to the vet for “the big snip”, then acting surprised when I freak out every time we go back there.
- The sleight of hand, fake fetch throw. You fooled a dog! What a proud moment for the top of the food chain.
- Invisible fences. Why do you insist on screwing with us?
Email This Post
Like this post? Subscribe to my RSS feed and get loads more!